Interview by Ma Dharam Jyoti

I met Swamiji in Mount Abu when he came there to attend a meditation camp. He had not taken sannyas at that time. I was there where Osho was staying. Swamiji also came there to meet Osho. Someone introduced us and I greeted him with a Namaskar. He bowed down to touch my feet. But I stopped his hands. I said please do not touch my feet. Then we hugged. That was the first meeting with Swamiji. After Mount Abu, I met him in Poona when he was working there. One day I went to the commune office and there was a celebration going on. I asked what was happening. Vidya said that Swami Om Prakash has become a grandfather. These were the two short and sweet meetings that I had with Swamiji. After many years we met in Rajneeshpuram. Then I came to know that Swamiji had shifted to Delhi and is running Rajyoga Center. I was working in the accounts department and whenever I used to check the account of Rajyoga, I was surprised with the amount of books being bought by Rajyoga. The name Rajyoga itself used to make me imagine the center to be very big.

When I was working in Zarathustra, he was also sent there to work. I was very happy meet him there. He told me that he will stay there for three months and work. Since he was elderly, he was given the charge of quality control that required less movement. We used to check each and everything whether it’s a book or a  photograph. Our coordinator expected him like everyone else to be at work by 7 in the morning. Everybody used to work from seven in the morning but Swamiji told me that it will not be possible for him to come at seven. He said, “I will come at nine, explain it to her”. I asked Swamiji, “what about your breakfast”. He said, “breakfast is out of question, when will I get ready and then go for breakfast, I cannot do things in a hurry”. Then he said that he needs to drink milk every night. I helped him in these little matters. I went to his trailer and found a vessel. I informed Swamiji that milk is kept in the refrigerator and he can have it every night. I also said that I go for breakfast so I can get him something to eat. So I used to get banana or bread butter packed for him. I spoke to the coordinator also that how you can expect him to come at seven, he can come at nine. She also realized.

When I was visiting Delhi, Swamiji took me with him to see the plot for Oshodham. H said “I will make a small mandir for you here, come and stay here”. I had this feeling that something was on his mind to call me here. Swamiji used to keep on passing this remark to me to come over from time to time. When Oshodham was to be inaugurated in the month of March, I was in Bhuj leading a camp. Swami Narendra had a heart problem and all his camps were cancelled. The people in Bhuj were not keen on canceling the camp and they asked that anyone can come for leading the camp. Neelam ma told me to go and I went. That was the first camp that I led. I kept my room locked in my absence. When I returned from Bhuj, I found an envelope on the latch. When I opened I found that it was an invitation card from Rajyoga on which it was written ‘inauguration by Ma Dharam Jyoti’. I came here and Oshodham was inaugurated. Camps were organized every six month. Then when I decided to move out of the commune, Swamiji told me to come here rather than moving in a flat there. I agreed. Before that he used to call and ask every now and then when I am coming here but  I was indecisive whether to come to Oshodham or not. So one day I made a phone call to him. Swamiji asked me when I am coming. I said I will see. Then lovingly he scolded me, “what is there to see, I am offering you  a diamond in a silver plate and you are saying I will see. No need to think, just come.” Swamiji was persuading me to come, knowing my hesitation. Then we regularly spoke on the phone and he used to ask always what I was doing. One day I told him that I am packing and sorting my belongings. He said what is there to sort, I am sending a truck, put everything in and come. That’s how I came here.

I felt a deeper heart connection with  him. Swamiji and myself were the only ones to live in Oshodham for about six months when I came here. Camps were organized every month. It was a beautiful feeling that he was there and I was there. Those days Swamiji had developed a liking for films. Every evening he watched a film and used to call me to join him. I did not like the violence in films, so I used to sit for 5-10 minutes and then leave. One day he sent me a message that he was about to watch Love Story and asked me to join him. Then he asked me what I do just sitting in my room. I answered that after many years I have got this opportunity to be in silence and I am enjoying these days, meditating and listening to Osho. He told me not to become a Jain Sadhvi. I can say this much that Swamiji was an epitome of Osho’s vision of Zorba the Buddha. He lived in totality both inside and outside. I used to watch Swamiji enjoying little things. He used to have ice creams those days and will ask me to have it too. When I refused he said you have to eat, it will not make you less meditative. Very lovingly Swamiji used to take care of others. When I asked him if I can make a long distance call to my friends since I miss them and that I will make payment for the call, Swamiji gave me a good piece of his mind. He said it is not hesitation but my pride.

Swamiji’s surrender was total for Osho and so was his reverence. As Osho says for a disciple not to use his intellect. Swamiji was like that without giving a second thought, just carry out master’s wishes. On one hand was his reverence and total dedication and on the other was the determination to do things. This was an unique combination I found in Swamiji. When it came to determination to do things, it was with total determination that he carried out the task. And when it came to surrender it was a total surrender. It is difficult to find these two traits together in a person which I found in Swamiji. Osho had said, “create a place for me” and Swamiji worked for it in totality without thinking what will happen later. When it came to determination, he became a Zen Master with a stick.

After his enlightenment, he became more sharing and loving. He became silent and started sharing more. Whenever somebody visited him, he used to receive, talk and was very hospitable to him.

Most of the time he used to sit with his eyes closed as if he is drowned in himself. I felt good to sit silently with him. Then he started satsang. Everybody felt the energy in satsang and in his presence we felt something has happened to him which we cannot describe. Whereas he had spoken to us about this. I feel that his journey was successful. He attained what he had to.

I have seen Mataji leaving her body and also of Swamiji. There is  a tremendous release of energy at the time of one’s leaving the body as I witnessed with Mataji. Till the end she was conscious and when she took the last breath there was burst of energy which I felt here when Swamiji left his body. When I went to Swamiji’s room in the morning and Swamiji’s body was on the bed I was suddenly shocked as if Osho was lying on the bed. Then I realized that he was no more breathing. I realized that his body has become silent. It was a beautiful moment to drink that energy and meditate. Now his presence is felt every moment. Of course we cannot verbally speak to him as he is not in his physical body but if one goes and sits in his room the same energy is felt. If one finds it difficult to get into meditation, it is as if his energy is helping us to go deeper into silence.

He was speaking to everyone a couple of days before leaving his body and shared that “I have built Oshodham, now it is for you to take care of it. I have done my work”. Swamiji was giving indications.

In the end I would like to share this beautiful experience. Everytime I left center for a few days Swamiji always asked me about the date of my return. This time when I was leaving for Kuchwara, I went to meet him, he was sleeping. So I left without meeting him. On 22nd of March in Kuchwara, I lay on my bed but could not sleep and I suddenly heard Swamiji’s voice asking me about my return. I replied that on 26th  morning I will be there and he said he will wait. It was a very clear vision that when I will reach there everybody will be celebrating death. It happened exactly the same way. Most of us were away from Center and when we returned, he met everybody in the evening. He left his body in total awareness after meeting us all.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *